Washington Whipped! Dodgers Say, “Gimmie Five!”

rascalsoftheravine fan club

September 17, 2017 by Shannon Michael Smith

The ship is apparently back on course as the Dodgers have won their second series in-a-row and aim for the sweep today in Chocolate City. The magic number to win the west has been cut down to five. Kind of like our limit on KFC’s Georgia Gold Chicken (otherwise we would eat several buckets…like Dom Deluise or that chick from Precious…)

Roberts says the team is trying to “get that swagger back”, can that happen?

No. Even if they win every series leading into the playoffs…that losing streak rankled and remains at the forefront in the minds of fans…

Do you think that the Rams can take the Redskins today cause it should—

THIS IS NOT A RAMS BLOG!

What about the Trojans last night?!

Okay, we’ll talk about that. We thought Longhorn scorn would topple the Trojans again, but USC remained cool till the end…incredible win…

Want to hear about another incredible win? You could save 15% on car insurance by switching to—

What the hell are you doing? We don’t have any sponsors, you dufus!

Yeah and it’s getting old! I want to advertise something, dammnnitt!

We already shilled for Kentucky Fried Chicken, what more do you want?

How about a Lowenbrau ad?

Hmmmm…tonight is kind of special…maybe we could use a beer with something MORE…

Yeah, a beer that we pour must say something MORE, somehow…

Well, let it be f*%^kin# Lowenbrau, then.

Who’s pitching today?

Noodles. He’s a bullpen baby in the playoffs fo sho….

He does kind of look like a giant infant…a Korean Baby Huey, if you will…

Or some kind of Devo illustration from New Traditionalists

I’ll take a Flicker Button, an Action Vest, and a New Traditionalist Pomp, stat!

We prefer the Sleeveless Maxi Turtleneck, ourselves…

Who’s hurling for the naughty Nats?

Stephen Stressburg, that guy is high strung!

Until next time, mirth-seekers!!!

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