August 4th, 2017 by Shannon Michael Smith
Throw some more Wood on the fire!
Amazing Alex earned his 13th win in Atlanta last night as Los Dogs bested the Braves, 7-4. Tony Cingrani tried his best to blow the game by coughing up three runs in the ninth inning, but to no avail. The Dodgers held on to win their 76th game (cue “76 Trombones”) and the series before they jumped on a jet plane for the Big Apple.
Are Yu kidding? Is today Darvish’s big Dodger deb-Yu?
Yes, and we are going to pound Yu jokes into the ground for the rest of the season, much to the chagrin of pampered scribes. Yu understand?
Who will dashing Darvish face?
Jacob deGrom, a key member of the Mets’ clown-hair society…
Yeah, what’s with all the freaky locks on that squad?
Perhaps it was a mistake hiring Carrot Top as their team barber.
Is Michael Conforto really a comfort to anyone?
Only to Travis d’Arnaud, the little “D” in his last name is constantly overshadowed by deGrom’s little “D”…
Is Curtis Granderson really a better son than any of his brothers?
No, he’s a better grandson.
Does Wilmer Flores use Tres Flores?
Not since his rockabilly days…
Is Neil Walker a Texas Ranger?
He’s clearly on the Mets, silly.
Until next time, mirth-seekers!