“Five-Inning Fannie” Sheds Snakes


September 17, 2016 by Shannon Michael Smith

The Dodgers relied on another solid outing from the ‘pen, as Kenta Maeda (or “Five-Inning Fannie” as he’s known around these parts) lasted…you guessed it, five innings. He’s done it all year. On another team with a lesser bullpen, he’s probably looking at a 7-9 record with tons o’ no decisions…

Today is the fifteenth Dodger/Diamondback matchup this year. Fifteen. MLB wonders why millennials and kids think that baseball’s boring and then they schedule sixteen sad snores with the Snakes. How about a home series against the Yankees? Nah, we’ll have the Rockies roll into town for the third time this year…awful…clueless…

MLB has bloated the schedule with divisional match ups that they think will be exciting (teams move up and down in their divisions faster) but in reality are duller than insurance conventions. Nobody wants to see the same old boring faces all year. This four-game yawner against the Snakes is ridiculous. Hey, it’s a good thing we get to see the Rockies three more times this year (said NO ONE EVER!!!!!)

Brock Stewart (1-2 6.55 ERA) will take the hill today for the Dodgers, Shelby Miller (2-11 7.12 ERA) gets the start for the Snakes.

Will—-no, no, we can’t muster up alliteration for this yawner…we just can’t…no alliteration until the Giants games, do you hear us? NO FRUIT CUP FOR YOU! Until next time, mirth-seekers!!!

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