Phillies Fizzle as Seager Slugs a Pair, Ravin Returns to Nest

2 mascots

August 9, 2016 by Shannon Michael Smith

Corey Seager smoked two home runs (20,21) and Josh Ravin returned to the bullpen (you remember Ravin’s string of bad luck from Spring Training…flu…broken arm…suspension) as the Dodgers beat the Phillies, 9-4. We should mention that Ravin’s Twitter page was a gas (when it was public).

The victory could have pulled the Dodgers even with the Giants if it weren’t for a 14th inning victory by the hated ones over the Miami Marlins. Where are Crockett and Tubbs when you need them?

The Terrible Teen (Urias) was only charged with one earned run in five innings (what else) worth of work, but he did forget to cover home plate on a throwing error (two more runs scored). We’ll have to make sure his mom confiscates his Pokemon Go for a few days, seems like a suitable punishment. Fields, Howell, Baez, and Ravin mopped up the rest of the innings (Baez surrendered the other run).

Dodger Stadium’s Extreme Loaded Dogs counter usually has zany concoctions that coincide with the visiting team’s city. In other words, they had a Philly Cheese Dog for sale last night. The Philly Phanatic himself was stationed behind the counter and would simply waft his boozy breath over the dog as a final touch before it was handed to customers. Tasty.

The Fightin’ Phils will send Vince Velasquez to the hill tonight. Los Dogs will shuttle out Kenta Maeda. Mr. Maeda won his tenth game in his last start, which means, of course, that he’ll struggle tonight (if Kenta can win two games in a row, we’ll do somersaults).

Will Vince Velasquez vociferously vacate his bowels for blue-crew bashers? Will Maeda marvelously make mince pies out of the flagellated Phils? Stay tuned! Until tomorrow, mirth-seekers!

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