Dodgers Demolish D-Backs, 14-3…Front Office Clowns Sit Mute at Trade Deadline


August 1, 2016 by Shannon Michael Smith

The front office has an insane knack of finding injury-prone pitchers. Bud Norris is the latest DL-bound starter as he never made it out of the first inning yesterday at the Ravine. The Dodgers ended up going on a home run derby spree (Grandal, Seager, and Pederson went yard in the 14-3 drub fest), which masked the injury somewhat, but we have to wonder what the team is going to do before the trade deadline expires in a few hours.

The Dodgers’ brain trust has an awful track record of doing absolutely nothing to bolster the team through a possible playoff run. We have to go back to 2008 and Manny Ramirez to find a decent pickup. Queto and Price were available in the past and are currently studs for other teams whilst Bud Norris goes down. We have a horrible feeling that Fried-man and Zaidi are looking at Chris Archer instead of Chris Sale. Sale is a top rotation stud. Archer is currently 5-14 with a 4.42 ERA, so naturally the front office is going to pick the wrong Chris…it’ll be Archer, of course (why should we expect good decisions from Los Dogs’ idiot GMs?)

The Dodgers have the day off today as they travel to Coors Field for another riveting series against the Colorado Rockies (who makes up this idiotic schedule?) Division matchups can be exciting…unless three of the teams in your division are garbage and you’re forced to watch one snoring series after another. MLB needs to seriously consider the Premier League’s system of promotion and relegation…every last place MLB team (in their division) at the end of the season goes back to AAA…ha!

Will Jon Gray greet Grandal and Gonzalez with gubernatorial gassers? Will Brandon McCarthy mellow-out moody madmen mired in morose melancholy? Will the front office actually swing a Sale switcheroo to shut up Shannon Smith? Stay tuned! Until next time, mirth-seekers!


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