Rotten Rockies Beat Dismal Dodgers, Mary Hart to Join Rotation


June 7, 2016 by Shannon Michael Smith

After sweeping the Braves over the weekend, the Dodgers lost to the Rockies last night, 6-1. Mike Bolsinger took the loss in the first of the three-game-series. The terrible teenager will get the start in game two tonight versus Eddie Butler.

Once again, the fair-to-middlin’ Dodgers were held to just one run and one hit in the contest. Pampered scribes are FINALLY beginning to give the harebrained front office what they deserve: the flamethrower. We’ve been calling for Friedman and Zaidi’s heads for over a year. They’ve run the Dodgers straight into the ground. The sad truth? With one pitcher, a popless lineup, and underachieving prospects (wait ‘till Seager runs out of gas) the boys in blue are years away from any postseason glory.

Hey! Apparently, we’re not the only ones who like to hang out at El Compadre in Echo Park. It turns out Bosch and his fellow detectives like to throw their “K Parties” there! If you don’t know what we’re talking about, and haven’t seen Bosch on Amazon yet, give it a whirl, it’s L.A. noire at its finest. Heck, in the first scene in the pilot, Bosch and pard are parked outside Dodger Stadium during a night game (see attached pic).

Tonight’s game starts at, you guessed it, 7:10. Will Eddie Butler flaunt a feast of fastidious fastballs? Will The Teenager torment ticket holders to tumultuous tears? Will rascalsoftheravine ever get their Rams tickets? Stay tuned! Until next time, mirth seekers!


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