Dodgers Hire Child To Succeed Scully


March 25, 2016 by Shannon Michael Smith

Apparently, DirecTv laughed like Vincent Price on Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” single when told about Time Warner’s price drop on Dodger broadcasts. If Vin Scully’s final season with the Dodgers is marred by this billionaire battle, it’ll be a cryin’ shame.

It seemed easy to assume that once Vin split that Charlie Steiner and Rick Monday would take over the legendary broadcaster’s duties. Sadly, that doesn’t seem to be the case as the team hired Joe Davis (the hire went down last November, he’s just taking the mic now) in ab effort to promote youth over the already available seasoned timbres. Dodgers fans are used to voices, like the old-timey, pull up a chair and have some Country Time Lemonade sound of Scully. If Vin’s the radio equivalent of your great-grandfather, then Charlie Steiner’s your nutty uncle from the east coast, he’s almost as old-timey as Scully and always quick-witted.  Let’s not forget the strong, seasoned radio resonance of Rick “capture the flag” Monday (we love this guy when he’s just reading car commercials).

It’s painfully obvious what the Dodger brass are thinking here (we gotta go young, no matter what.) After driving Nancy Bea Hefley from Dodger Stadium with pitchforks and gaudy stadium techno, we’re surprised blue brass hasn’t fired anyone over 28 (or worse, see Logan’s Run).

It all boils down to this; treasure these last games with Scully, you’ll never hear anyone like him again. Oh, and if you work at Dodger Stadium and you’re over 30…run for the hills.

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