March 14, 2016 by Shannon Michael Smith
Glendale, AZ. Ryu’s on the comeback trail, he threw 20 pitches (he hadn’t thrown in a few weeks) today as he inches closer to recovery.
The screaming banshee is back! She’s a Dodger fan that holds court in the stands at Camelback Ranch. Her shriek is somewhere between a drunken cowgirl and a savage hyena (we have no idea what she looks like, we’ve only heard her voice over broadcasts, rascalsoftheravine will try to find her tomorrow). Her shrill cry pierced Brewer broadcaster Lane Grindle’s call today constantly, he’d occasionally give an irritated chuckle (like Robert De Niro right before he shoots somebody) when interrupted.
Tomorrow morning at 4 AM, rascalsoftheravine heads for Tequila Towers (our headquarters in Glendale, AZ) for live Dodger Cactus League coverage. We’ll be telegraphing all our posts back to our Los Angeles office, or using our buzzard, Steve, to transport columns via air in case house band Question Mark and The Mysterians break the telegraph’s wiring post again like they did last year. Needless to say, there may be a delay or two in post times.
How’d They Pitch?
Mike Bolsinger made his third appearance of the spring. He cranked through the first six batters easily, with back-to-back 1-2-3 innings. Other than giving up two hits and a walk in four innings, Bolsinger, AKA The McKinney Mammoth, basically plowed through mediocre Milwaukee. J.P Howell (9.00 ERA) sliced through the first three he faced in the fifth. Jansen (4.50 ERA) gave up a run in the sixth, 6-1 Dogs. Baez and Coleman each threw drama-free innings and Chris Anderson coughed up a run in the ninth. 6-2 Dogs.
How’d They Hit?
In the first inning, Micah Johnson singled and advanced to second on a wild pitch. Puig popped up (his icy bat has yet to thaw this spring) and Justin “Kringle” Turner (back in action after resting his repaired knee) torched a RBI double. Austin Barnes (.389) singled Turner in. 2-0 Dodgers. Alex Guerrero reached first on an error, and center fielder Trayce Thompson (his icy bat has thawed) torpedoed a three-run homer to make it 5-0. Kringle walked in the third. Gonzalez grooved a RBI double. 6-0 Dogs.